The art of making yourself uncomfortable

The day before yesterday i had a social event to attend. i know for others it ain't a big deal but for me it is. Social situations never fail to make me uncomfortable. Iam super socially awkward to the point that i don't know where to look at whilst having a conversation with someone.

They might be someone i know from day one but still it be like that.  when did i develop this?? idk you tell me. maybe during the pandemic when i had so much fun being at home for more than 6 months. Things are changing now but not my social anxiety. I tend to over contemplate and complicate even the smallest things. 

Social anxiety is a cruel thing, because i do not want to converse with people because i appear awkward and i seem plain rude whilst ignoring them.

So day before yesterday, how did it happen? well honestly for the one time in my life i wanted to do something out of my comfort zone and make myself uncomfortable for once. 

Did i have the best time of my life? certainly not. but it was not bad. I realized that having to have a very smooth conversation you need to listen more than you speak and not cut them in between. All that is fine. It restored some of my old relationships in a good way.

I consider all of this a prep for my college days, as much as a non-sociable person that iam. i love making myself uncomfortable once in a while to gain some confidence to enter into college. Not that i aspire to be the life of the party in college but someone who is not afraid of social situations and knows to pave a way through every convo .

 Because College is not just about studying, but its also about people , some interesting ones.